Stay calm: Practicing mindfulness may be the solutions to becoming more responsive and less reactive in stressful situations. If you are depressed, you are thinking too much about the past. If you are anxious, you are obsessing about your future. The best way to handle either of these is to concentrate on the present moment which can help calm you.
Using experiences of your past is okay since you want to try to avoid making the same mistakes. When you're constantly thinking about past events to the point where they stress you out, it’s time to let them go.
You may be dealing
with the consequences of something that you were responsible for in the past.
However, you are still dealing with the consequences now, in the present, and
so you should handle them with that in mind. The most important aspect of the
past is to make sure you learn from it.
Planning certain aspects of your future is important. However, nothing is for sure, and any plan you set up may not come to pass. In that case, you'd probably need to change the plan. You may also need to change plans that you're making now. You'll need to make decisions now that affect your future, but don’t obsess about this either.
Some people get so hung up on planning for their future that they forget to live their lives. What happens if you are not around to enjoy those plans? You will have spent your entire life not living the way you should.
Another problem with living entirely for the future is you will miss out on enjoying life with your kids. They grow so fast, and that is one part of your past you will regret, i.e., not spending time and doing more with them. By living in the present and not worrying so much about other time frames, you will have memories with your family that you can always look back on. Family memories are a great part of your past and something that you can happily think about anytime you want.
If you do look back on your life, you will see that everything worked out. When situations occurred, you handled them, and you moved on. Just think about that the next time you find yourself dwelling on the past or the future. Someday, the situation you are experiencing right now will be a part of your past.
To paraphrase the Dalai Lama, if the whole world practiced meditation, there would be no wars. He spoke of the calming effects meditation has on people. Meditation gives you the ability to reflect and focus on what’s important while disregarding what isn’t.
Letting go of the little stuff is important to stay calm. Letting go makes sense since if you are getting stressed out over every situation you come across, you simply cannot relax. And being stressed out is a surefire way to a nervous breakdown.
Meditation allows you to clear your
mind and has a calming effect since you are not thinking about your problems.
As you finish your meditative sessions, you tend to remain calm. You are also
more prepared to handle problems that come your way.
The biggest problem with meditation is it takes time for it to be effective. Because of this, some people pass it off as being nonsense and think only gurus on mountaintops use it. You need to stick with it for a while before it starts to show benefits for you. We are too conditioned for instant gratification. People simply give up because they don’t think meditation is right for them.
It is a good idea to start with guided meditation when you first begin. With guided meditation, the person speaking has experience in how to get you to a relaxed state. Of course, there will be some due diligence on your part to make sure you find a qualified and experienced meditation specialist. Ask friends, family, and colleagues for people who have gone through it successfully.
Be careful with the information you find online. Many people will appoint themselves experts when they have no experience. It’s not a regulated field, so you get plenty of pretenders and wannabes. These people are usually offering up courses that others are offering. Why not just go directly to the course of a qualified trainer?
Sometimes, meditation & Yoga classes run alongside each other which can be useful for a more well-rounded experience. It will help with your mind and your body. When trying to become calm, you shouldn't overlook your body. If your muscles are hurting, this can cause you to become stressed out. Too many people believe Yoga does not get you fit like vigorous exercise. However, when you look at most Yoga instructors, you will see they are in fantastic shape. The naysayers are ones who have never given Yoga a try.
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You are what you feed yourself. I'm talking about both the body and mind. Having a negative outlook stems from not being fully confident in yourself. In order to find the positive in your life, start with what's amazing about yourself. Practice these strategies daily to stay calm and remind yourself how awesome you are. Get in the habit of regular self-care and stick to it. This will help you change your outlook towards whatever situation presents itself. Baby steps!